Extract - The drugs

    '....Brendon and Saul met me at the pub on the Saturday following my first experience with speed.  Saul asked if I wanted to go thirds with them in a bag again.

      ‘For sure,’ I said, instantly aroused.  ‘But this time I want to do it like you guys do.’

     Saul looked at Brendon, a slight frown on his face.  Brendon took a deep breath then sighed.

     ‘It’s your choice, man.  It’s the best way to do it, but only if you’re careful.  We’ve never told you to do it this way though, it’s your decision.’

     They took me to a house in the seedier part of Wallsend.  Two huge Rottweilers bounded up to the corrugated iron fence and barked ferociously, slobber drooling from their meaty lips, before a tall thin man emerged from the house and called the dogs off, letting us through the gate.  After looking me over suspiciously, he invited us inside. 

     There were half a dozen people in the lounge room, not counting the couple of toddlers.  There was a sickly musky smell in the air, a blend of pot and cigarette smoke and beer.  Each person wore a thin sheen of sweat on their faces in the warm October night air.  I stuck fast to Saul.  These people looked scary, dodgy, and I felt scrutinised.

     After a brief discussion with the man Brendon told me to go with him and Saul into one of the bedrooms, away from the kids.  Inside was a woman in her mid-thirties, with dirty peroxided hair, and dark circles that spread heavily below her sallow eyes.

     ‘It’s his first time,’ Brendon said to her.  ‘You’re up, Ivan.  Roll up your sleeves, man.’

     I was suddenly incredibly nervous.  I hadn’t expected to go first.  Saul made a makeshift tourniquet with his hand around my upper arm, holding it steady at the same time.  I looked away, fearing not only the sting of the needle, but terrified I would overdose.  This was new territory for me.  I felt the sensation like a small ant biting me before I heard her say ‘All done,’ and pressing a bit of tissue into the crook of my arm. Saul released his grip.

     Instantly I tasted the speed, again in the back of my throat, but in a much more palatable form  than when we I had snorted it.  Then my chest suddenly announced itself with an emphatic Boom! That reverberated around my body, my veins delivering the stimulant to all areas of my body in a milli-second.  The rush took my breath away and left me panting, like I had just had an orgasm.

    Five minutes later I re-emerged into the lounge, a new version of Ivan.  I was confident, I engaged with the strangers who no longer seemed so unattractive or unapproachable.  Brendon and Saul and I stayed and talked, listening to music until daylight crept over the east-edge of Wallsend.  I even made friends with the dogs. 

     I had never felt so accepted.  I had never felt so alive....'